About to drop my 5th (and final) child off at college

**Darrell KSR** · 08-13-2019, 12:23 PM

Wow.

Have moved him in. He's in a lunch meeting and Mom is finishing putting together his room, like she's done for the four others before him. I've never really felt anything but excitement for all of my kids, but this one is kinda getting me. He's the last, the youngest. The kid I had the pleasure of coaching in one sport for 10 years, and the one I've enjoyed watching play for many more years in another sport.

Leaving him in a small school in Mississippi, he has 3 hats he brought with him. A soccer hat for his college, a yellow goofy YOLO hat just to mess around, and his blue UK hat he had when we took our boys trip to Keeneland, to Commonwealth to see UK play Mississippi State, to the Blue-White Game, and to Churchill Downs. We still talk about it and wanting to do it again someday.

Wow. So many memories and he's grown.

Will miss him like crazy.

I'm sitting in the car getting the dust out of my eyes before saying see you later. We will be back to visit numerous times, but it will not be the same.

Now where are my dark sunglasses?

**Catfan73** · 08-13-2019, 03:00 PM

My boy starts his junior year in high school tomorrow. I don’t know what we’re going to do in two years when he leaves for college.

**BigBluePappy** · 08-13-2019, 06:41 PM

Taking my oldest granddaughter to UofL tomorrow and her parents are a wreck.
We have a lot of dust around here too...

Prayers for all parents, grandparents and students during this time.

**KentuckyWildcat** · 08-15-2019, 11:34 AM

If anyone starts getting the empty nest feeling....I have a 5 year old and 2 year old you can borrow

**CitizenBBN** · 08-15-2019, 12:02 PM

Five seems low. You sure you haven't misplaced a few?

I wouldn't worry. Statistically at least 1 or 2 of them should show back up and live with you through their 30s or 40s.

**Darrell KSR** · 08-15-2019, 01:03 PM

Originally Posted by KentuckyWildcat

If anyone starts getting the empty nest feeling....I have a 5 year old and 2 year old you can borrow

It's funny. Before I was married, I was thinking two kids would be plenty. And they are.

But as my youngest approached late middle school, I realized that I would have loved having more kids. Having a large family has been more than I ever dreamed it could be. Oh, there are bumps in the road. It's not all a bed of roses. But if I had to do it over again, I would like an even larger family. School, friends, social, church, sports, performances, and just hanging out with them? Just wonderful. Maybe five was the right number for us. Somebody would need to drop a package of gold ingots on my doorstep for more kids, anyway. But it has been a great ride.

**Darrell KSR** · 08-15-2019, 01:05 PM

Originally Posted by CitizenBBN

Five seems low. You sure you haven't misplaced a few?

I wouldn't worry. Statistically at least 1 or 2 of them should show back up and live with you through their 30s or 40s.

Noooooooooooo! Curses on you.

My 30-year old just dropped off my cell phone plan this week. My 27-year old twins are still on it (along with car insurance). I'd just like those to live close, if possible, not forever be on the Cartwright Bed and Board freebie plan forever.

**KentuckyWildcat** · 08-15-2019, 02:34 PM

Originally Posted by Darrell KSR

It's funny. Before I was married, I was thinking two kids would be plenty. And they are.

But as my youngest approached late middle school, I realized that I would have loved having more kids. Having a large family has been more than I ever dreamed it could be. Oh, there are bumps in the road. It's not all a bed of roses. But if I had to do it over again, I would like an even larger family. School, friends, social, church, sports, performances, and just hanging out with them? Just wonderful. Maybe five was the right number for us. Somebody would need to drop a package of gold ingots on my doorstep for more kids, anyway. But it has been a great ride.

Funny. Obviously I'm joking about dropping them off, sort of.....They are daddy's girl and never leave my side. But at this point I cannot imagine having more than 2. I had to be convinced to have the second one lol

I told myself when I had them that I would not look back. That I wanted to enjoy each stage of their life. So far, I've done a decent job of that. But I'm sure there will come a time when I will wish they were little again.

**CitizenBBN** · 08-15-2019, 04:19 PM

Originally Posted by KentuckyWildcat

But I'm sure there will come a time when I will wish they were little again.

When they become teenagers.

Then you'll wish they were young, old, whatever, just not teenagers.

**CitizenBBN** · 08-15-2019, 04:44 PM

Originally Posted by Darrell KSR

Noooooooooooo! Curses on you.

My 30-year old just dropped off my cell phone plan this week. My 27-year old twins are still on it (along with car insurance). I'd just like those to live close, if possible, not forever be on the Cartwright Bed and Board freebie plan forever.

Oh, not wishing it on you. Just running the math.

When I got out of college I lived at home for about 6 months till I got a place and got going. Went pretty well, mom didn't try to have curfews and such, and honestly I wasn't running around anyway, but it was good to get a place.

**Darrell KSR** · 08-15-2019, 05:55 PM

Originally Posted by CitizenBBN

Oh, not wishing it on you. Just running the math.

When I got out of college I lived at home for about 6 months till I got a place and got going. Went pretty well, mom didn't try to have curfews and such, and honestly I wasn't running around anyway, but it was good to get a place.

People think we are nuts, but except for rare situations, we stopped having curfews for kids in their junior year of high school. All of our kids went away to college - nobody too far, but far enough, and we kinda wanted them policing themselves while they were under our general oversight, since soon enough, we wouldn't know where they were and when they were.

But yeah, having a safety net is a good thing. You took advantage for six months and your mom handled it right. Hopefully we do too.

**CitizenBBN** · 08-15-2019, 07:15 PM

The way I graduated I really wasn't in position to do much else. Needed to recover and get a plan. But I did power through and save the tuition bills, so mom was WAY ahead. It was a win/win.

But those apron strings are never fully cut. When I can't get the cleaners to get my shirts clean the right way I still go to mom.

**Doc** · 08-16-2019, 06:08 AM

Dropping off is step one. My youngest is in his last year of collage and my daughter is getting married in November. The.marriage is the biggie. Holy ####. Praise be for every boy you have simple because its one less wedding to pay for. It is almost as bad as a house when it comes to hidden expenses.

We planned well for both our kids educations. Prepaid college funds. Daughter has a undergrad from FL Atlantic and Master from the Univ of FL with zero debt. Son will have his degree from Univ of Central FL in May and is considering a post grad degree in computer sci, also zero debt. We always felt that we brought them into this world and owe it to them to educate them so they can support themselves. It is what my parents did and taught us to do.

And many of you know the story of my expanding family..how my daughter and her boyfriend became permenant residents in our home, the quintessential millenials....living in the figurative basement (they had the hurricane room) for nearly 7 years. Kids never truly leave, at least in this generation. We had to move to get rid of them, literally

**Darrell KSR** · 08-16-2019, 11:20 AM

Well, I haven't mentioned it publicly yet, Doc, but I've got a wedding coming up, too (oldest daughter). Date TBD (Spring to early Fall, 2020).

**MickintheHam** · 08-16-2019, 04:30 PM

Darrell, the things you will miss most are the kids’ social activities. You go from people coming and going to nothing. HS kids at home are different than college kids who come back to live. College grads just disappear for long periods. Teenages always seem to come and go. And the club and HS sports, will leave a real void. And worst of all, your wife will be spending more time with you, bringing home the reality of who she really married. That may not go too well.

**Darrell KSR** · 08-16-2019, 05:44 PM

Originally Posted by MickintheHam

D And worst of all, your wife will be spending more time with you, bringing home the reality of who she really married. That may not go too well.

That has a lot of merit lol.

I'll be making a trip to Jackson from time to time. But it won't be the same, and don't know if he'll even earn any PT. Plays a position they rarely sub, which was great til now lol.

I need a hobby. I really want to start the flying lessons.

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