I know I don’t post much and when I do it’s either about my weight loss or a comment regarding the football or basketball team but today I’m asking for a little bit of encouragement.
I have been in grad school for 2.5 years - including summers to obtain my family nurse practitioner degree. I have worked full time up until this semester when I’m required to complete 360 clinical hours along with 3 didactic classes which all require multiple papers and assignments. Throughout my program I have achieved passing grades and high reviews from my preceptors. I have a 3.8 gpa and am in the Sigma Theta Tau National honor society for nurses due to my academic achievement.
This semester I was placed with a preceptor I had never met before. I knew of him through Ron’s family and they only spoke in the highest possible terms about him. I was excited to get an opportunity to learn from him for my final clinical rotation and be able to visit with Ron’s family on a weekly basis at the same time.
I thought things were going well. The patients all like me. I’ve had 3 people in hiring positions for other practices offer me jobs while I was caring for them during their office visit. I’ve had others tell my preceptor how wonderful I am and even a few asked if I was going to stay on so they could transfer their care to me.
Well at midterm my preceptor basically wrote an evaluation stating I’m incompetent and not close to being ready to graduate. He told my professor that I had no clinical foundation and basically do not know what I’m doing. This failed me for my midterm. Since that time I’ve had to jump thru multiple hoops trying to prove my competence. The day after my midterm evaluation 2 providers in the office came to me individually to tell me they feel I’m doing an incredible job and that my preceptor is being nit picky and unreasonable. They contacted my professor (without me even asking them to do so) and told her this. It did not make any difference to her in the least.
So here I sit - 5 weeks from graduation. I have a 3.8 gpa. I’m in their honor society. I’m attending clinical and seeing and treating patients- and my preceptor and professor do not believe I’m capable of being successful.
To say I’m distraught is an understatement. I’m terrified; scared; horrified; and basically feel like I’m being made a scape goat for no reason. I’ve never missed a diagnosis in all my hours at clinical. I’ve never misdiagnosed a person. Their big problem with me is they say I ask too many questions and chart too much. So because I want to be thorough and not miss things I’m incompetent?
Like I said it’s 5 weeks til graduation. On 4/13 my preceptor is going to re-evaluate my progress. Depending on that evaluation is if I graduate or not. I have that pit in my stomach feeling it will not matter what I do - he is not going to pass me. The other 2 providers in the office said if any of the other students in my class were being scrutinized at the level I have been they would be failing too.
I guess I just needed to let it out and tell someone. I’m ashamed and disheartened and a bit bewildered.
So if you have any free time - and don’t care to take a minute or two - I’d like to ask you to say a prayer or two for an old KY girl who knows in her heart she is more than capable of doing a great job if only given the opportunity - even if one person doesn’t think so. Thank you for this forum and all the support you have given me and my family over the past 16 years. You are like family and I hope you never forget that.
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