the real question is can one dunk without crossing the free throw line or will you have to be in the charge/block circle?
the real question is can one dunk without crossing the free throw line or will you have to be in the charge/block circle?
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
This is why you don’t play a “back to the basket” big anymore.Originally Posted by UKFlounder
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"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
Also, “double-dribble” is especially bad…
How do you go for the "and one" in this scenario?
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
It really adds meaning to “personal”foul
Just as long as the refs call the hand checking...
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
LOL!
This is a fantastic joke.
~Puma~
Not if you are the alligator.
Could have been a girl alligator.
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
On a crowded bus, an elderly lady noticed a man with his eyes closed. “What’s the matter? Are you sick”? She asked.
“No I’m okay”, he replied, “I just hate seeing old ladies standing.”
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"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
Halloween entry…
Frank and John left the bar after a long night of drinking, jumped in the car and started it up.
After a couple of minutes, an old man appeared in the passenger window and tapped lightly.
John, the passenger screamed, "Look at the window. There's an old ghost's face there!"
Frank, the driver sped up, but the old man's face stayed in the window.
John rolled his window down part way and scared out of his wits, said, "What do you want?"
The old man softly replied, "You got any tobacco?"
John handed the old man a cigarette and yelled, "Step on it," to the Frank, rolling up the window in terror.
A few minutes later we calmed down and started laughing again.
Frank said, "I don't know what happened, but don't worry we're doing 80 now."
All of a sudden there was a light tapping on the window and the old man reappeared.
"There he is again," John yelled. He rolled down the window and shakily said, "Yes?"
"Do you have a light?" the old man quietly asked. John threw a lighter out the window saying, "Step on it!"
We were flooring it and going about 100 miles an hour, trying' to forget what we had just seen and heard, when all of a sudden there came some more tapping.
"Oh my God! He's back!" John rolled down the window and screamed in stark terror, "WHAT NOW?"
The old man gently replied, "You want some help getting out of the mud?"
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"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
Man goes into his doctor's office for a routine checkup.
He sits just across from an unassuming but attractive young lady in the waiting room.
After a minute or so she sneezes, but when she sneezes she then slightly shudders, gasps, breathes deeply, and then slowly composes herself. About a minute or so later she again sneezes, then shudders, gasps, her breathing changes, and again she then calms down and composes herself.
This continues for a good 10 minutes, sneezing several times with the same reaction each time.
Finally his curiosity overrode his politeness but he was still trying to be subtle and indirect. He asked "excuse me, but I can't help notice your sneezing. Do you have a cold or something?"
She blushed somewhat and sheepishly replied "no, I have allergies but also a rare malady where each time I sneeze I have an orgasm."
Stunned, the man was silent a moment trying to think of something to say. Finally he said "that's very ...uh... interesting. Are you taking something for the condition?"
"Yes" the woman replied. "Ragweed."
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
A teacher asks the children in her class to discuss what their fathers do for a living.
Little Mary says”my dad is a lawyer, he helps put bad guys in jail”. Little Jack says “my dad is a Dr he helps make all the sick people feel better”.
After all the kids in the class had a turn Little Johnnie had not taken his turn. The teacher says: “Johnnie what does your father do”? Little Johnnie says: “my father is dead”. The teacher says: “I’m very sorry to hear that, what did he do before he died”? Little Johnnie says: “ he turned blue and sh!*t on the carpet”.
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"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
U really think players are going to duke without being paid over Kentucky?--Gilbert Arenas, 9/12/19
LOL! He showed his thinking.
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
Teacher: Who can use “definitely” in a sentence?
First Kid: The sky is “definitely” blue.
Teacher: Sorry, but the sky can also be grey, or yellow and orange.
Second Kid: Trees are “definitely” green.
Teacher: Sorry, but in autumn trees can also be orange, yellow and red.
Third Kid: Do farts have lumps?
Teacher: Of course not.
Third Kid: Ok… then I “definitely” **** my pants.
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"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
LOL!
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
He says it is the only way to vent the CO2 gas from the gas stoves.
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
I hope BEvans sees this one--
One day around the water cooler three co-workers are complaining about their love life.
Tom: "I'm telling you, we've been married so long that I'm lucky if my wife and I have sex once a month."
Jerry: "Once a month? Why, that would be a boatload of sex for us. We have birthday and anniversary sex now and that's about it."
The two turn to Frank (sitting quietly). What about you, Frank? You been married as long as we have?
Frank: "Well, my wife and I have started role-playing in the bedroom." Tom and Jerry appear impressed, and Frank continues: "Yeah, her favorite role is sexy librarian. I have to sit quietly while she reads a book."
Wow, I didn't know my first wife got remarried. Good for her. Not for him, but good for her.
People keep asking if I'm back and I haven't really had an answer. But now, yeah, I'm thinkin' I'm back.
Joe took his blind date Kim to the carnival. What would you like to do first, Kim”, ? Joe asked. “I want to get weighed” Kim replied. So they walked over to the weight guesser where the guy said 120 lbs. Kim got on the scale and it read 117lbs, so Kim won a prize.
Next they went on the Ferris wheel. When the ride was over Joe asked, “what would like to do next Kim”? Kim replied “I want to get weighed”. So they went back to the weight guesser, the guy recognized her and guessed 117lbs which was correct so Joe lost his dollar.
They walked around the carnival for a little while and Joe asked Kim, “well, what would you like to do next”? Kim replied, “I want to get weighed”
So now, Joe figures she’s really weird, so he takes her home early, and drops her off with a handshake.
When Kim goes in the house her room mate Laura, asks Kim how her blind date went. Kim replied “oh Waura, it was wousy”
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Last edited by blueboss; 02-02-2024 at 06:32 PM.
"I have touched all the so-called capitals of basketball, but when it gets down to the short stroke, the only true capital of basketball is in Lexington." AL McGuire
OMG it took me about 20 seconds to catch the true punch line.
seeya
dan
I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.
An Irishman heads down to his favorite pub and standing outside is a nun. Before you enter, think of your dear mother and father she says rather loudly.
He says Well, they’re both in heaven, I don’t think they’ll mind.
Then think of the damage the drink is doing to your body! she continues.
The Irishman thinks for a second and says “What are you talking about? Have you ever even had a drink?”
The nun says No.
Well then how can you stand there and talk about what it’s doing to my body if you’ve never had it? I’ll tell you what, I’ll go in and get you a drink, bring it out, give it to you and you drink it and if you don’t like it THEN you can talk about it but don’t judge things you’ve never experienced! So what’ll you have?
The nun says I don’t know. What do ladies generally drink?
He says gin.
She says alright. I’ll have a gin. But get it in a cup so nobody will notice.
The fellow goes into the bar and says Give us a pint of beer and a double gin in a cup.
The bartender says Is that bloody nun out there again?
changing my signature to change our luck.
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