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Darrell KSR
11-25-2012, 06:20 PM
(Sorry to steal bigsky's subject - it just fit so well with this I had to use it. My apologies.)

I'm not entirely sure the purpose of this post. It for sure isn't "holier than thou," as I realized today how little I have given of myself to others less fortunate. So maybe it's just a confession of my own soul. Maybe it's a "thank you" to those of you who have done this regularly.

It's also not meant to be political in the slightest. I don't want to talk about the hows, and whys, and wheres. Just the "what is."

My wife, my 11-year old son, my 13-year old daughter, and my 20-year old son all volunteered today at a "soup kitchen." It was a regular Sunday lunch meal, but Thanksgiving-themed, with turkey, dressing, green beans, rolls and dessert. I know some here have spoken about this before, and some do it regularly, but I have never, in my 52 years of age, ever done this before today. It for sure won't be my last time.

What an eye-opening experience. I expected to see homeless people, and did, of course. What I did not expect to see was the appreciation, the courtesy, the thankfulness. I heard more "yes, sir," and "thank you" comments than I hear in a month with people I run into on my every day experiences.

One man was apologizing for wearing so many coats (I was helping him take them off and put them on his chair to be seated.) He chuckled at me, and told me "I'll need them tonight."

Man.

He wasn't complaining, just stating a fact. That's his "clothing," "shelter," and "home." And it's cold tonight.

I saw people there who have been dealt a hand less than ours. People who have afflictions of sorts. People who have real disabilities. People who were mentally challenged.

And they all were so polite and so appreciative. One of the guys that serves regularly told me that he has gotten to know a bunch of them. He sat down and visited with them from table to table. I began doing it myself, and thought at first they wouldn't want me interrupting their meals. Boy, was I wrong. They appreciated the company. They appreciated being treated the same as anyone else. The color of your skin didn't matter, your education or who you knew didn't matter. What mattered is that they were talking with somebody who accepted them for who they were, and wasn't judging them. Almost all of the men shook my hand as I greeted them to seat them, and told me their name as I gave mine.

I apologize for my naive view of what I experienced. I just didn't know.

We had apple pie and pumpkin pie to serve. I asked one visitor if he wanted some apple pie or pumpkin pie. He told me, "no thank you, sir, I've already had a piece of pie. One is enough for any man."

A simple piece of pie was enough for any man. I know he wasn't meaning it as a metaphor, but it struck me when he said it.

My 20-year old son, in a glaring display of contrasts, drove from a local country club where he buses tables as a part-time job to get there after we did. Some of the people at his country club have money to buy small countries. Many of these people didn't know where their next meal would come from.

My 11 (soon to be 12!) year old son, on the drive back home, said, "Dad, thanks for taking us."

That's all he said. He's a good and loving kid, and is very good about saying that if I take him to a ballgame, or if we go to a movie, or have some family outing where he had the time of his life. There, he had nobody his age, no friends, nothing to play with, and he was just a "gopher."

Thanks for taking us.

I feel the same way, son.

Happy Thanksgiving.

CitizenBBN
11-25-2012, 06:39 PM
You're a fine man Darrell C.

I will take issue with the idea that you haven't given of yourself enough. Beyond all the rest you've raised a great family that will contribute to those around them far beyond our years on Earth. I wish you'd have recorded everything you did b/c it should be taught to every new parent.

Being a mostly downtown dweller I've dealt with homeless people since later childhood. I've found good and bad, but the idea they are rude or ungrateful is as wrong as thinking country club people are civil and have values. The worst behavior I've ever seen is among the opulently wealthy. Money can cover for a lot of rudeness and mistakes.

To paraphrase MLK, you judge a man on how he does his job, not the job he does. I resent very much when people are dismissed b/c of their dialect or dress, just as I do people being given a pass b/c they have money, usually not of their own making.

Great post as always.

bigsky
11-25-2012, 07:30 PM
We have one here, works similarly, a family or group of friends takes one night a month, picks up the food from food bank (cooked) serves and cleans up. Working well.

jazyd
11-25-2012, 09:58 PM
Darrell, I have done the one here and it is a blessing more for us than them imo. Glad you and your family got to help for a day, now take it a step further and do it during a non holiday period. This time of year it seems many want to 'help' but the rest of the time those soup kitchens can really need help.
Thanks for stepping in.

Darrell KSR
11-25-2012, 10:38 PM
Lot of you have done this, jazy and bigsky, and you guys rarely, if ever mention it. Just one of those things you do to help someone out and don't think anything of it.

I am "signed up" for the next 3 (I don't know the dates, so they are tentative; they email and call when it gets set up). They don't do it that often--like bigsky, it is spread around very well, and it may not be for another 2-3 months. I am looking forward to returning.

Catfan73
11-26-2012, 01:22 PM
My 10 year old son and I volunteered a couple of times this past summer at a community center that provides lunches to school-age kids during the summer when they get no school lunch. The older kids try to stay proud and keep their dignity, but you can tell it's probably the only real meal they'll get all day. It really opened my son's eyes and to my surprise he expressed how glad he was that we did it.

I haven't volunteered at a real soup kitchen in awhile, but we're going to soon. Thanks for the inspiration Darrell.